Sixteen Candles

Kathy, I mean Kate, and me 2012

Yesterday, I made the two hour drive to San Diego to see one my best friends. Okay, let me explain. Girls are the only ones who care about the "best friend" title so not to offend my best friend, Diane, of 30 years, or Chris, my childhood best friend, or my sister, Robin, who is like a best friend or my cousin, Jana, who I love like a best friend, Pam who I worked with for 16 years or Gina who I serve at church with....WAIT, am I the luckiest girl or what??? Now that you all know how important you are to me, I will continue. I met Kathy in the 7th grade at a small, neighborhood church, New Haven, in Tulsa, Oklahoma. She was short, (everyone was shorter than me, even then) freckled face, funny and had the guts that I wasn't born with. She liked Peter Frampton, Kansas, and Gary Wright and still to this day when I hear the song "Dreamweaver" it takes me back to her yellow bedroom with a white fur bedspread...so cool in 1975. When she put that album on, she would stand there, put her hands in the air and sing it like she was performing at Madison Square Garden. All talking had to stop and we had to pay homage to Gary and his Dreamweaver. We spent EVERY day together during the summer, weekends during the school year and never fought about anything. She taught me how to do a back flip on the trampoline and a back dive off the diving board. She was fearless and I was a chicken. I think that is why I liked her so much....that and she laughs really easily. 

I moved to California when I was 16, just when stuff was getting really fun. Kathy stayed and went to school there and eventually got married and is now living in Scottsdale. We have kept in touch over the years, but life got crazy and busy and we haven't seen each other in 12 years...until yesterday. Kathy is in San Diego for a week with family and that was too close not to make the drive. Yesterday was 1976 all over again. Peter Frampton did not show up, but we didn't need him. I would love to say that we haven't changed a bit but when I look at the picture we took at the beach yesterday, I still see the cute freckle face girl sitting next to a middle aged lady with wind blown hair. We have changed. We have been through stuff that our 16 year old selves could not have imagined...both good and bad. We are way more interesting (Kathy has a new name, Kate, that her husband gave her in college), loving, forgiving, entertaining and depend on God way more than we did at the tender age of 16. Plus, we now realize that we don't know everything and are not afraid to admit it.

I really can't explain how a friendship last over 40 years. I've been told that relationships, marriages, and friendships have to be nurtured in order to be sustained but this friendship hasn't been nurtured at all. It has a life all it's own...we just choose to join in. It's almost like Kathy and I were weird Siamese twins separated at birth....she got all the freckles and I got all the height and every time we see each other it is some crazy cosmic reunion.

Life is going by way too fast not to value your dearest friends. I think it was Susan Sarandon who said in a movie, "A husband is a witness to your life." I think that is really true but especially true about friends you make during your youth. That is why it is so much fun to get together and reminisce. All these things that are distant memories come alive again and takes you to a really rich place.

Who is your Ethel to your Lucy?? Call them up today and laugh about something you did together. You know laughing adds years to your life. Kathy and I plan on laughing all the way to the senior center!